Not along and not apart.
Tuesday, November 11, 2014
10:16 PM
I think I always procrastinate blogging lol and end up with lotsa things to blog about but then I'll be too lazy and just cut short everything so meh.
Last week of school ugh my grades and percentiles are bad I'm gonna die. Also keep oversleeping lately, I hope this does not become a habit. I think I'm gonna die. Dumb me only ate popcorn and McWings meal on Friday, then didn't eat dinner and breakfast, then went training and almost fainted. Never fainted before but nope, I don't like the experience.
So after that I went to Adam Road Food Centre to buy food haha because training venue was close to it and close to school and I had to go to school on a Saturday because Council but yeah ANYWAY I felt kinda happy? Cuz I went to buy lotsa foood hehe food and drink which Jing Jie and I bought when we go together :))
But yeah I've been trying to eat more lately because I don't wanna faint :/ but ugh fattening. Doesn't help that when I want to exercise/go for training I get a splitting headache which forced me to take like two pills of panadol so yup I hope I don't die.
I don't always do this but OMG COUPLES IN SCHOOL YOU DON'T KNOW HOW LUCKY YOU ARE UGH it pains me sometimes :c but yeah whatever I don't always do this but Jing Jie is an amazing person idc what you think but he's so nice and caring it melts my heart aww. Even though we don't meet although his house is like one bus service away sigh absence makes the heart grow fonder I hope omg this is so cheesey eww.
But yeeeah sometimes I think about how people actually behave differently in front of different people and I'm curious as to how different it is and why or how. How did things happen in a way, from strangers to the exact opposite?
But yeeeah out of all the love stories I've heard, I still think ours is the best. And lol you nosey people kayyy just to refresh my memory because it's one of the few things that keeps me sane and happy lately.
We kinda met during SST Alumni friendly with the current SST people hurhur idek why I just happened to be such a busybody and volunteered to help keep. Thennn I told Hakeem that Jing Jie looked familiar and he was like no because he'a a retainee then I'm like oh okay. Blah end of the day all Jing Jie did was ask for my name which was pretty random but I was thankful because practically nobody talked to me and it was so awkward being the only girl there so ya.
So that was a Friday then on Tuesday I happened to take the same train as Jing Jie LOL FATED IDK but nah I was sleeping lol idek why I keep embarrassing myself so yeah at Botanic Gardens stop I woke up and stood up and WOW he's standing there so I kinda smiled because it's awkward to smile in the direction of like 10 other people because they'd think I'm mad or something so yeah pretty cool right it's my favourite story :)) continued on my 15 August post I think? HAHA so yup that's how we met kinda but how we got together is a different story maybe I shall save it for another bedtime story ha ha yes I'm mad telling myself bedtime stories sobs what JC does to me.
Actually also trying to think of happy thoughts and trying not to break down but I don't wanna blame others because I'll end up feeling guilty and blaming myself but sigh. I hope I can change people for the better, at least. That's what everyone says I do, but I can never change myself for the better sigh. I don't want to be the one leading again - that didn't turn out well - so this time I shall remain silent and hope that it doesn't hurt too much because it's about this time of the year that everything goes wrong and I don't think I can live through this a second time.
How do we take back cause no one wins when love breaks down we both die. Uncaring or oblivious - sometimes I don't know which is worse. And then I start to question my decisions. I've never made good choices - how is this any better?