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    I'm hoping for the day when you'll terribly regret it to come.

    Sunday, February 14, 2016 9:23 AM

    Valentines date more like tuition date but that's okay sometimes being busy takes your mind off things. Maybe that's why I keep working. Instead of studying, of course. I can barely remember anything I learnt in school although it's been like, only two months?


    Busy busy spending my days watching videos hahaha I finished 103 episodes in 3 days??? D. Gray-Man of course hoho for the third time!!! All abroad the 7-8 years of wait train omg it's been so long. But then I read the wiki page for the manga version and omg it's so twisted. D: but I will watch!!! When it comes that is. My eyes hurt so bad it feels as though my myopia got worse by another 200 degrees (if so, bye bye rsaf application). But anyways the opening and ending songs are always v nice!!! Except like, two. But yah like this song in this post is nice too. :)

    Haish but distractions still suck but I'll be okay as long as you're happy. What is this stupid feeling of care for someone who doesn't reciprocate? The chase was always better than the fall and at least I lengthened the inevitable, eventual fall I guess. I don't know. I'll be fine. God is enough for me.

    It's alright with me if you're happy, but I won't say I am because I don't think there's anything I can do to fix this loathsome, twisted heart of mine.


    I'll taste the sky and feel alive again.

    Monday, February 8, 2016 6:29 PM

    I just keep wondering about you and what you do and what you think about me now and about everything. Things change and people change so I guess feelings go away although circumstances have always remained the same. I don't know. I can't let go. (Yet?) I wonder everyday.

    I keep thinking. About the truth behind what you say. About how genuine everything was. The purpose, the reasons for even caring for me or pretending to. Was it fun? Was it fun to be loved and cared for?

    CNY today and while the occasion does kinda relate to me a little, it makes me all the more sad. I can never really celebrate such traditional, racial customs. Because I'm neither here nor there. There isn't so much of a feeling or understanding of it. I guess that's how you feel about religion. All the more I should just move on yeah? I really thought we'd make it how naive and foolish of me. Your choice isn't me. What a depressing thought. What a depressing reality.

    Yes we live in a multiracial society, we live harmoniously. But the sad thing is, I don't think we'd ever be able to adapt to each others' lifestyles.