Zzz not only do I not have time to blog, I don't have time to read other people's blogs either-.- ohwait I don't even read other people's blogs anymore lol.

I think the only reason people read blogs is to stalk/find fault in people. So in happy times like this, there's nothing to blog about, nothing to rant about, nothing to gossip about. Yay. That's about great.

Phewtick is finally going viral in NJ. To those whom I told to download it last year but were skeptical: HAH IN YOUR FACE. Just kidding. It wasn't viral then. But the points were good. Now's just meh. The scary thing is that the teachers are skeptical too, when they found out :/

First time going dinner alone. Achievement unlocked. And now I really understand. Its not about your social image, how people look at you, its daring to do what you want, when you want. Its about your life and achieving what you aim to achieve. Thanks for the encouragement :)

Lulz sorry for not blogging for a long time. Not that long actually but yeah. I'VE BEEN BUSY. Meh. The earliest I slept in a long time is 1am >.> and no, it doesn't mean that I wake up at 1pm lol.

Oh life sucks its so stressful :'(

Umm. I wanna make a scrapbook ._. But sadly, I don't have picture perfect memories :( even if I do, I don't have pictures. -wails- hey you, care to help me? :')

Hurhur so I was supposed to post this yesterday but I was too tired.

WAA I HATE MYSELF. ITS NOT LIKE IM SAD OR UPSET OR ANYTHING I JUST CRY. EVEN IF I DON'T WANT TO. WHICH I DON'T.

Sigh maybe I really need counselling so I can "manage my emotions". Quoted from someone.

Sigh its even harder to talk about this cause no one knows. And no, I am not gonna speak to an adult. At least someone helps <3

BUT STILL. TELL ME HOW DO I MANAGE MY EMOTIONS. I JUST DON'T THINK ABOUT IT AND I'M FINE. IS THAT RUNNING AWAY FROM MY PROBLEMS? ITS NOT EVEN A PROBLEM. HALP.

Haha there is really something weird. Everybody keeps giving me food for my birthday. Is this a sign? Do I take the hint that people want food for their birthday? Or does everyone want to make me fat omg.

Typing this out at 1234am! :D so yeah I'm super tired from PT + PE which was practically an equivalent of PT. Wow I might just become fit lol. Weep weep. Its just the second week of boarding and I'm dying already :( needa plan my time for studies and NJCIS and HTNS -wails-

Someone please tell me to stop pedo-ing on that JH1 guy :'( I feel so bad and stalkerish! (Though I don't deny that).

Hehe looks like goldfish is back :3 more or less. I don't get fishes. Sigh.

Boarding sucks this week has the least study preps!! For Terra anyway. Urgh. I don't care if I sound like a mugger but I want study prep. Study prep above anything. But nooo we're all rounded so we must have good character and entrepreneurship skills yay.

Hope the year passes by quickly :'(

Oh Conor whyyy. Why would you want somebody to treat you like an animal? D; its a nice song though :3

I swear the only reason there are many likes on my photo is because of my cat. Hmph. Famous much. But its okay :') yes, I'm homesick again. I wanna go homeee! Everyday. So I can see the people I love. Weep weep. Boarding is no fun.

Happy belated birthday Zayn <3 wishful thinking that I could get a follow :'(

Weirdest birthday ever. I think my family is trying to tell me something heh. What's with the influx of food I feel fat._. So yeah. I think its about saving money. And I think I prefer birthdays to allowance. So I'm 16 and I get $160 from each of my parents so that means my sister will get $200 x 2 = $400. Wow.

Or maybe its because I don't treasure things?? Aaah! I'm a bad girl :/

Anyways! Yeah I guess I should save and stop buying nonsense :'( and also attempt to save my phone from its worsening state :'(

MY CAT IS SOO CUTE.

Whahaha so far: 5 birthday texts, 5 facebook wishes and 3 birthday tweets. Thanks guys :) I don't think I find the point of staying up to see who wishes me and stuff. I just stay up to study meh.

Thanks Christel for being the first person to give me a present! :)

Are you back to haunt me. Go away. Nobody wants you here. Don't ruin my life for a second time. Once is enough.

Birthday or not, life goes on. 365 nights, why just one when we can have all?

Softball is such a horrible game :'( hehe its okay Christel! My eye is less swollen I hope I'm fine xP

OMG I SAW HIM!!! After PE! On the way up to canteen! And he was going down. AND HE REMEMBERS ME!!!!!! AND I TALKED TO HIM!!!! OMG I AM BEYOND HAPPY BEST BIRTHDAY PRESENT EVER! :3

Heh. Someone will have alot of admires though :/

And laugh when they don't
And walk when they won't.

Ohgod. That stupid film Ms Khoo played during LA is still stuck in my head zzz. Its not bad I suppose lol._.

Urgh. Today is a horrible day. The only happy part was me stalking my favourite junior heh.

I am so affected. I wanna cry. Its not even me and it feels just as bad. Boohoo. I don't even know what to do. Feel so helpless.

PMS mode on. I hate everyone and everything just go away and leave me alone!!

When you shoot across the sky like a broken arrow.

So today I reluctantly went to help out CAFE trials. Aka CCA tryouts for JH1s. It was meh. Tiring to keep reloading the gun especially when you have to do it on the table.

BUT in the end it was WORTH IT.

BECAUSE BECAUSE BECAUSE. I SAW NICHOLAS!!!! Yknow the guy I blogged about a few months back during DSA camp I was helping out. Such a nice person! :3 AND AND AND he actually went to my lane omg!!! So I got to teach him how to shoot!!!!!!! (Sorry for overreacting)

But I didn't recognise him until he wrote his name on the shooting card AND I'M LIKE OMG I THINK I KNOW YOU. And sadly, I didn't say that. STUPID ME!!! Wonder if he recognises me :0 because Regine saw Jensen and Jensen recognised her!!!

IDC I'M GONNA FIND NICHOLAS TMR AND SAY HI TO HIM!!!!

ps. I am not a pedo._.

Yay I got to be secretary again! :D thanks everyone for the support HAHA. Though it was walkover heh. Never knew secretary had to do stupid stuff :'( but its okay! :)

AEP is tiring. Especially when your groupmates don't come >:(

Help I'm getting annoyed at everything bleh. I just want to sleeeeep. Had a stupid nightmare last night and today had to run 3 rounds for PE and I didn't sleep in any lesson lol. PE CHEAT MY FEELINGS I WANNA KNOW MY HEIGHT AND WEIGHT ://

Nike sucks the sole of my shoe is about to come off again!

Bwahahaha typing this during study prep. Before study prep I mean. And I'm in an even worse mood now cause of some people whoops. And I know its very immature of me but bleh nobody knows~ I don't hate anyone else though heh.

Whatever. I'm in a good mood and I won't spoil it. Friday faster come! :3

First day of school! Honestly it was boring meh. Obviously. There's something about boarding and school that's super dusty it keeps making me sneeze :( its like theres 1000x more dust in the air or something.

Lessons were okay. I was falling asleep and missed one slide of MI lecture which instantly jolted me awake lol. Chem was great :D GS was angmoh teacher! Mr Deric Low (however you spell it) was trying to prove me wrong and brainwash me thinking that the government is great. Just because I said I supported opposition. And made my excuse that housing was skyrocketing sound super lame. Should have kept my mouth shut ohwell.

Think what you like. I'd forsake company any day for good grades. Except for those who I truly care about of course. But too bad. I'm not feeling very friendly nowadays especially ever since the holidays I've become an introvert and just enjoying someone's company. So pardon my indifference.

Meh. I was gonna edit and add on the the previous post but my internet curfew got...well, worse. So yep, typing this as a draft at 11.30pm.

So anyways. Sigh. Time together is just never quite enough. I need forever :'( i need forever to make amends boohoo. I want to rewind Friday. And yet I don't want too. Since when was I such a good person? Didn't feel the slightest guilt years before and now its driving me crazy. Same thing, different person. Oh how people influence me.

Song of the day: Runaway Love - Justin Bieber. Please don't let me be that.

Omg. So today I finally went out of the house to school to collect my long outdated ic (WHICH THEY STILL HAVEN'T GIVEN ME. Looks like I'm going to jail :'( ) and to repair my stupid graphic calculator which keeps spoiling (I GOT A NEW GC HEHE). Its WEIRD. Omg soo weird. Makes me feel thankful that boarding is term 1 so I don't have to walk at the mrt area on the way to school or on the way back from school feeling ultra self conscious.__.

Waa. Actually saving $400+ a month is difficult :/ sorry guys. I'm reviewing my reciprocating policy so no more reciprocating birthday presents this year >< shall finish up last year's though :) Sheylyn, Ariel and Yanyu :D

I'm really bored of doing instagram photo a day challenge meh I don't have nice pictures to post :'( AND I'M REALLY REALLY REALLY SORRY DAMN WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME CAN I JUST SHUT UP AND IGNORE HIM. BUT NOO. -slaps myself- I should just deactivate twitter and instagram nooooo.

Today was great but never again until I'm your girlfriend. Heh. And wow I suck. Lost five times in duel masters. T.T

So many songs we forgot to play. Gah I'm soo upset. -cries-

Geez. I also wish my parents could teach me schoolwork. Primary school was a breeze.

I don't know if I'm too nice or just weak but I can't stand doing such things to someone. And especially if that someone actually cares for me. It hurts me to see you hurt. In a basic human feeling of care of course, nothing more.

But really. I don't understand why someone could do such things. I'd feel honoured when someone likes me. I'd never hurt them, even if I don't like them back. And everyone makes mistakes, probably not as ugly as mine too, why can't you forgive them?

Its better to be friends than enemies. Better to be friends than strangers. And the scariest thing of all, the reason why I never want to hurt those around me, is because what goes around comes around. And that's when you'll really feel someone's heartache and heartbreak, what you did to them, how they cried for you.

And friends, that is why you never, ever go around breaking people's hearts. (Unless you have a really valid reason like the person breaks your soul, like me.) And if you had your heart broken, don't be sad and depressed forever. Get up and improve yourself. And if you're really that mean like me, make that person regret being bad to you. Someone better will come along and love you for who you are anyway. Stay strong. :)

Haha so almost everyone has school today. Bwahahaha. Me? Woke up at 10am and cooked and ate and leisurely completed my homework and went out to buy groceries. You jelly :P

Speaking of which. I feel old. I mean like, I'm going to be sixteen next week. S-I-X-T-E-E-N. Maybe some people might find that young but for me its old. No more being excited because of new school like in Sec1. No more being excited because of new uniform like in Sec3. No more happy go lucky.

And maybe the truth is just starting to sink in. All those long talks and lectures by my parents. Its time to start being responsible for myself and my future. Like which university do I want to go to? Overseas or local? How many years? Bachelor, masters or doctorate? What will I work as? How long will I work? When am I getting married? Do I want to be engaged first? How long? Where am I going to live? How am I going to get the money? When do I want to start a family? How many children do I want? Do I quit my job and take care of my children? How am I going to take care of my parents? How am I going to take care of my in-laws?

So many questions, so little answers. Sigh. I shall earn enough money to get a house and a car and get married by the age of 25. I shall save money and not buy anything. I shall make my own breakfast and bring food to school to eat. I shall not waste time daydreaming. I cannot.

This is better than my new year's resolutions eh.

Happy new year guys. I am soo stupid. I slept at 1030pm. Fell asleep, whatever. And I didn't even put my phone on vibrate. Oh god why.

Consoling myself that people are stupid to celebrate new year and that's why I didn't watch tv or listen to the radio this year. But nooooo. I cannot be forgiven :'( this is a crime.

This will obviously top the list of #2013regrets -cry cry-

On the non-existent brighter side, new year new aspirations and hopes and dreams and prospects and resolutions. Its a matter of perspective. And I swear I'll redeem myself for this foolishness I've done :(